(This is hypothetical, I thought this would be an interesting way to respond!)
While teaching my fourth grade class I overhead one of the white males call a black student a ‘nigger’. I was horrified and shocked. I quickly explained to the class (who all had heard it) that this word is not appropriate to use, ever. I explained to them that it was used in a very degrading way during the times of slavery, and that the word is putting down a whole race of peoples. The boy chimed in and said, “Well, my father says it all the time!”
I told him that sometimes we have to be better than our parents, and rise above the past. I created a lesson plan for the next day and taught on slavery and racism. I tried to explain cultural diversity, and that we needed to be accepting of everyone because they had the same feelings as we did. I spent the day answering questions and reading short essays and stories wrote about slavery. I asked the students to write a short paragraph on why the word should not be used, and asked them if they had any more questions they didn’t want to ask they should see me after class.
I was happy to hear the white boy apologize for his wording.
Suppose the parents ‘just don’t care’. That’s the situation I would be most uncomfortable in. They were born in the slums, and that’s were they believe they will stay. (I remember a child like this in High School – which is why I’ve, chose it.) There child is going to school only because they ‘got to’. I remember the teacher, a friend of mine and a friend still, had a hard time trying to convince the student that he did in fact need to be in school. And that he could be better than his parents. It was a sad situation, what do you do when you are faced with it? He had been brought up his whole life thinking that all he will be is nothing. She tried to talk with the parents, with him; with other teachers… they did the best they could. Like them, I would offer extra help, get him counseling if he was willing… just try to get his mind set changed that he could do it. Show stories where others like him succeeded, show him it’s possible. I would be there for him to make it possible – do whatever it takes.
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I know some children who are faced with the same thing. I find out that the parents are soometimes the one who make the child feel like they can not become something good in life. There are a lot of children self esteem at risk because of an uncaring parent.
ReplyDeleteParents who just don't care are the hardest to deal with. I so often come across parents who think it is my job to teach and their job to feed and clothe the child. Trying to explain that it needs to be a team effort is sometimes impossible. I always think this is sad for the kids because they are getting such mixed messages. I'm telling them they need to do their homework with their parents and the parents just aren't interested.
ReplyDeleteWOW! I have been in that same situation with some of my first graders and I was surprised also. I think children spend entirely too much time watching T.V. and wanting to hang around the older crowd. Children sometimes are not aware of what they are saying and how their words can effect the other person. You are about our children needing to be better than our parents! Our parents need to monitored what their children watch and what they do more closely. Nice posting Autumn.
ReplyDeleteI was worried about 'going there' with that word, but I feel like it's possibly the most controversial word out there. I’ve heard it used in the wrong situation many times in my school career, used in the worst context.
ReplyDeleteI'm also very worried about having a parent that doesn't care. I know how hard it's been on the teachers I know as friends, and those parents are the one's I'm looking forward to the least.
I think it is horrible that some parents really don't care about their child's welfare. I couldn't even imagine not caring about my child. I would always want the best for my child, no matter what. Even if I had a child with special needs, I would still try my very best to help them with whatever they needed to succeed.
ReplyDeleteI also went there with a hypothetical of ni**er. (I don't even want to type it!) I went with that word because it is too often used. I think it is wrong and very ignorant if a parent said something like that in front of their child. It is definitaly something that we ALL have to rise above!
I really don't get parents who don't care about how they kids behave in school or about how they perform academically. It is so hard for me to swallow. That's going to be a hard one for me too. I see this now working as a case manager. I have parents come in and want help for their kids, because they can't do anything with them. So, they quickly want the kid diagnosed with some mental issue so that their conscience can be cleared of any guilt that some of the child's issues being the parent's fault. I have a particular case now where the mother wants her son to be mature, responsible, and successful. However, she has moved in a guy who doesn't work and is a criminal. I really want to say to her, "Bravo Mom, really good example of what he should be when he grows up!" So many parents need wake up calls and we have to find professional and respectful ways to give them to the parents.
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